When my ex first moved out, I took a short break from homeschooling and put the kids in school while I figured out how to balance everything as a single mom. (Ultimately, I found out I couldn't!)
Last year I pulled them all back out of public school and began homeschooling again, but used a computer-based curriculum, to ease back in, and not overwhelm myself. They quickly fell behind. It seems they picked up some little habits at school... like... not doing the assigned work, because it didn't really matter in public school whether they did it or not, for the most part.) I adjusted and readjusted. I reorganized. I simplified. I dropped subjects that weren't absolutely necessary for the time being. And still, they couldn't catch up. They lied about doing assignments. They complained. They gave minimal effort. Despite being warned repeatedly that if they didn't complete the year's work, they wouldn't move forward... that they would either be held back to repeat that year or they'd be put back in public school... they continued to slack off and fell further and further behind on work that was neither too much nor too difficult for them. So well in to what should have been our summer, I gave them a choice. You can put in the work... and continue behing homeschooled, like you insist you want... or you can quit now and go back to public school, knowing once I'm not homeschooling anymore, I don't plan to do it again. So, once you go to school, you're staying there.
Molly immediately gave up. (Yes, Molly's back home. More on that in a future post.)
The boys continued to lie and cheat on their work... sealing their fate as well.
Hallie... well, she was determined. Through (figurative) blood, sweat and (literal) tears of both herself AND her grandma, who dedicated her summer to doing study hall so Hallie could catch up, Hallie finished her work a week before school was set to begin again, and was my only remaining homeschooler. (Happy birthday, by the way, Mom!) That lasted only a few weeks. Despite her insistence that she wanted to remain homeschooled, bit by bit, she delayed and complained, and finally one afternoon, she dug in her heels and refused to do her work. So I told her to grab a backpack, and I immediately drove her to the middle school where her brothers attend, to enroll her.
So... all my kids are in school.
Hallie (6th grade) has joined the band and hopes to play the flute.
Gideon (7th grade) has joined the soccer team and has practice everyday after school... they had their first game yesterday, and unfortunately lost... but there are plenty more games!
Molly (5th grade) is applying to join a girls running program after school 2 days a week.
Sam (8th grade) is preparing for high school and... well... so far he's giving his new special education teacher plenty to handle. That boy's gonna be the death of us all.
And as for me... I'm figuring out what to do when your full identity has been turned on it's head. Homemaker, wife, homeschool teacher and foster/adoptive mom... becomes... just... Hilary. This transformation hasn't been easy. It's required the support of a few faithful, understanding friends, and admittedly, also a prescription for antidepressants. But a few things are in the works, and I'm figuring out who this new person is, bit by bit... in the end, I think I'll be as surprised as you to find out who I end up.
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